The Music in Life
by acciomemories
Summary: "Ah, music! A magic beyond all we do here!" Albus Dumbledore / A collection of drabbles and one-shots written for the Music Appreciation Challenge using the band Skillet for inspiration / 2) Severus Snape
1. Sick of It

**Summary: Sirius was tired of his parents. He **_**had**_** to leave. Where should he go? The Potter mansion, of course. **

**Warnings: There is a little abuse. Nothing too violent though (I don't think). But I mean, this **_**is **_**Sirius's family, they're bound to be harsh. Just thought you guys should know. **

**Written for the Music Appreciation Challenge with the song **_**Sick of It**_** by Skillet as inspiration. :D**

**Sick of It**

_/If you're sick of it, _

_Take a stand/_

"If you had been in Slytherin like Reggie-"

"Oh, don't you throw that at me again. Don't you think it's getting old by now? I know I'm not as good as perfect little Reg. There's no need to tell me- _again_. You've done that enough."

"And those friends of yours-"

"DON'T YOU DARE BRING THEM INTO THIS!"

"Oh. Hit a soft spot, have I? We told you the last person you should befriend was that blood traitor Potter, and what do you do? You go straight for him."

"Well, if you don't know by now that I like to go against everything you say, you must be denser than I thought."

Sirius was struck across the face, and he stumbled backwards.

"How dare you talk about your mother like that, Sirius?"

"How dare you hit your own son like that? But here we are."

"_You_-"

"What'll it be this time? Grounded? No food for a week? Locked in my room?"

"Locked in your room for the rest of the summer. You're lucky we're even letting you go back to school. We're taking your owl-"

"_WHAT?_"

"-and if we hear that you've been talking to any of your friends (the blood traitor, the mudblood-"

Sirius finally exploded. No one- _no one_- talks about his friends like that. That's the one thing that he can't stand.

Through gritted teeth Sirius spoke to his parents, "He's not a-a-a... _That_. I've told you not to use that word. How you even found out he was a half-blood is beyond me..."

As he was talking, he slowly headed toward the stairs.

Finally his parents caught on, "Are you walking away from us? We're not done with you yet-"

"Oh, I don't know. I think you are. For forever."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"I think_ I'm_ done with _you_."

With that Sirius ran up the stairs quickly, never looking back. He threw everything in his suitcase, and grabbed his owl.

When he came back down, his parents were waiting at the bottom of the stairs.

"Is that so? You can't decide when you're done with family. You can't just run away. Where will you even go?"

"I don't care. Anywhere's better than here."

He tried to push past the two adults standing in front of him, but his mother reached out and gripped his arm firmly. Sirius flinched and stiffened, preparing for what came next.

With every word she said, she hit her son, "I- hate- you. Get- out- of- my- house."

She threw him from the house, then the trunk out after. It was raining, just to add to the horribleness of the day.

Before she closed the door Sirius shouted after her, "I don't believe the house is yours, exactly. Doesn't it belong to father?" He would make sure he always got the last word in.

His mother shut the door, but he could still hear the angry scream she let out. Sirius inwardly grinned, satisfied.

He grabbed his trunk and got his wand and a few Sickles out. He walked up to the street and stuck out his wand arm.

A double decker bus came speeding into view. It stopped in front of Sirius.

"What're ye doin' in the rain, lad? And at night, too..."

Sirius just got onto the train without bothering to answer him.

"Could you take me to the Potter mansion? You know where that is, right?"

"Yep, 'course I do."

Sirius payed him, and then walked towards the beds and sat on a random one.

After a while, they arrived at James's house. At this point, it was very late, and Sirius was ashamed to be knocking on the Potter's door, but he really had no other choice.

He unloaded his trunk and his owl, and then began to walk down the Potter's sidewalk, towards the front door.

By the time he got to the door and knocked, he was soaked in rain water.

It took a couple of minutes for the door to open (_Great, I woke them up. The only family that I feel welcome with, and I woke them up in the _middle of the night._) _

Luckily, it was James that answered the door.

"Sirius? What are you doing here, mate?"

"I-I couldn't stand them anymore, Prongs. They drive me insane. They said things about you and Remus, and-and-"

"Hey, it's okay. It'll be okay. You can stay with us."

"Are you sure? I mean, I don't want to impose, but I really lost it with my parents. I doubt they'll take me back. I wouldn't be surprised if I got blasted off the family tree."

"Come inside, come inside... Oh, you're soaking wet...Of course you can stay. My parents adore you. They'll be so happy to see you, though I think that'll have to wait until morning. I'd rather not wake them... Are you hungry?

"Perhaps a little."

"Sure, sure. We have some biscuits on the counter, and... Sirius?"

They had stepped into the light of the kitchen, and James noticed a very large bruise on his friend's face."

"Did... did they _hit _you?"

"Oh, um, well, you see, uh-"

"Oh, Merlin, _Sirius." _James breathed.

"It's fine, really. I'm used to it... Oh, no, I didn't mean..."

"Come here, I'll get you some ice."

"You don't have to-"

"Nonsense. Here."

James gave Sirius an ice pack, muttering under his breath. Sirius only caught phrases, "...I'll kill them..." and "...to their own child...".

Sirius put the ice pack to his face. He winced a little when the ice touched the bruise.

"Your parents are very heavy sleepers, James." Sirius said, trying to lighten the mood.

James let out a weak chuckle. "Yep."

Sirius grabbed a biscuit from the table, and, after James suggested it, the two headed up the stairs. Sirius changed into dry clothes, and then they got ready for bed.

"G'night James... Thank you." Sirius whispered.

But James was already too far gone to answer.

* * *

The next morning, Sirius was slightly worried about how James's parents would take him coming to their house in the middle of the night.

They headed down the stairs, Sirius trailing behind.

When they entered the kitchen, James's mum said, without turning around, "Hey, James, dear. Breakfast is almost ready-"

"Mum."

She turned around and saw James... and Sirius standing in front of her.

"When did you... well, of course you're welcome any time, you know that, but I would've liked to have said hello..."

"Oh, sorry, I came last night. My parents..."

"Oh, dear, what have they done now?"

"Um..."

"It's quite alright. You can stay here-"

"I ran away."

"You... ran away?"

Mrs. Potter closed the distance between herself and the young man, and enveloped him in a hug. Sirius hugged her back tightly, secretly craving a mother's love.

"Oh, you poor thing. They must have done something dreadful. Of course you're welcome here."

She pulled away, and because they were so close, she too saw the nasty bruise on his face.

"What... _Sirius_, dear. Did they do that to you?"

"Well... yes. I said something they didn't quite like and..."

"You'll never go back there, understood? I... I can't allow that. You'll just have to live with us. James has always wanted a brother anyway." Mrs. Potter smiled at Sirius.

Sirius hugged the woman again, and whispered, "Thank you. Oh, _thank you._"

**A/N: The ending might be a bit abrupt, I apologize. That just seemed like the best place to end it. **

**I hope you guys enjoyed it. I'd love if you dropped a review on your way out. They make me HaPpY. :D :D**


	2. now that it's over

**Summary: Snape regrets the choices he made, and struggles to face the consequences of his actions. **

**Warnings: Mild profanity (nothing major), Angst (**_**very**_** angsty), character death, and thoughts of suicide (kind of. He doesn't come out and say it, but he does wonder...)**

**Written for:  
****Monthly One-Shot Competition (#32 Regret)  
****Music Appreciation Challenge (**_**Lucy**_** by Skillet)  
****Fantastic Beasts Challenge (Bundimun- write about someone losing something)**

**Lucy**

Now that it's over

I just wanna hold her

I'd give up all the world to see

That little piece of heaven looking back at me

Now that it's over

I just wanna hold her

I've gotta live with the choices I made

And I can't live with myself today

This can't be happening. This _can't_ be happening. How did I let this _happen_?

She's dead, and it's all my fault. I couldn't keep my damn mouth shut, could I? I just had to go to the Dark Lord. I just had to tell him.

I cost her her life. How can I ever forgive myself? How can I ever live with what I have done? Won't the shame, the agony, the _depression_ kill me eventually?

When I heard the news, everything else faded away. It was like I was in a dream, watching my life from far,_ far_ away. Almost as if I was watching someone else's life.

I apparated to Godric's Hollow and saw the house. But could I even call it a house? It was so demolished, so broken. _Just like me_, I thought.

I slowly walked in, and then I was running. Running up the remaining stairs. Bursting into the room. The room where Lily was.

"The boy lives."

So what? The love of my life, my only love, is dead. At my hands, basically. I killed her.

I completely break down then. Those words haunt me, it's all I can think. I _killed_ her. _I _killed _her_. _I killed her_. The words repeat over and over in my head.

A sob rips from my body and I throw myself on the ground. I gently gather her delicate body,_ Lily's_ body, to me. I hold her close, convinced that I'll never let her go. Not again.

I've never cried before, never thought I ever would. My life wasn't exactly easy. But still, I've never cried. What does crying solve? I used to wonder that all the time. My mother cried. But I never quite could. I couldn't allow myself to do that. That would be giving my father the satisfaction, and I just couldn't give in. Not when that's what he wanted, so desperately.

Even when Lily and I stopped being friends, after the horrible mistake I made, I never cried. Sure, I'd wanted to, but it was like my eyes wouldn't cooperate. I guess I knew, somewhere, in the back of my mind, that at least I'd still see her. At least she'd still be there. The loss wasn't that great (oh, but it was).

I thought I'd felt the worst pain that could be felt, during my childhood. I was wrong, of course. This tops everything. Every painful thing I've ever felt... This is worse. Much, much worse.

Wave after wave of agony consumes me, crashing me against jagged rocks. Throwing me back into the sea of depression. Again. And again. Time after time. Every second worse than the one before it, the realization that she's really _gone_ sinking in, slowly, finally. To the point that I don't think I can handle it any more. I'd rather die.

I don't die, of course. Lily's gone. I've lost her, but I'm not allowed to follow her. Why would anyone be granted an easy way out, right? We're all stuck in this place. Left to struggle through. And for what? What is this- all of _this_- for, anyway? What do we get for living our life? When does this hell end?

She left me to cope with my loss. Deal with my grief. All alone.

She left me to pick up all the pieces of my shattered heart. By myself.

She left me to reconstruct my life. With no one to help me.

No one to tell me, "It'll be okay."

No one for me to yell at, scream at, so they can feel just a fraction of the pain I'm going through, "It's never okay!"

No one.

**Word Count: 612**

**A/N: So I just kind of poured my heart into this... Hope you liked it! :D **

**Dedicated to my friiieend from school, Kayla, who knows how I feel about... this. She's kind of the only person that understands. And she's my other half (no, siriusly, we're one person: Kaylamorgan. It's a real thing. :P). If you read this, Kayla dear, I love you. So. Much. :D **


End file.
